2011 Carnival Legend cruise report, Monday

Sorry for the delay, we had a deviation from the normal scheduled activity.  See, we got Val's mom a new computer, and brought it home to download it's updates and a virus checker.  It took a while on our fairly fast internets, it'd have taken a month on dial up, assuming we can find a modem thingy for it.  It'd be so much easier if they'd just spend 3x for internets and ditch the dial up, then they could internet and Wessy or Sissy could call anytime of the day or night and not get the dreaded busy signal.  Or! they could enjoy internet as AlGore intended instead of sitting on the couch staring at the phone waiting for Wessy or Sissy to call when they expect them to call.  Actually, since they always call in the middle of dinner, they sit there hungry staring at the phone....but enough of that, get on with the good stuff.

Sure, I could have used the new computer to write the bloggy thing, but my shortcut button/favorites button bar isn't on that computer, besides, it has windows 7.

Sure.  I could have used val's laptop to write the bloggy thing...but I can't really type on it.  I'm amazed that anyone can.

Ok.  Monday.  First sea day.  Nothing really planned except for the cruise critic meet and greet or meet and mingle drink-fest boozeathon at 2.  Val and Brenda were going to the steakhouse info-mercial and had some plans, but I didn't have any plans other than to stroll about the ship.  So I went to lido for breakfast.  What a disappointment.  Eggs, watery/runny blech.  Sausage:  a mixture of 5 or 6 in a bucket with onions and peppers.  I like sausage, but not some of them in that mix.  Potatoes, ok, kinda cold.  They have build an omelet, pancakes, loads of stuff scattered about the deck.  I don't feel like standing in a lot of lines, so I just get some stuff, find a seat and eat.  None of it is very good.  BTW, I've got my camera, my dumbly named ebook device and my insulated mug along, and they don't have trays...just huge plates.  I don't dare put anything down at my table and go off for drink or more food, I won't find my way back.  See....it's sea day, everyone is there, it's crowded, and every area looks the same.  Makes me crabby.

Off I go to find a comfortable place to sit to read.  Maybe I'll find my spot outside.  I don't even try the lounge chairs by the pool.  I could sit on one, but for reading...nope.  I go on down to the "serenity deck", which is a small area on the back of the ship (aft), has some hammocks, some big circle chairs, some lounge chairs and NO KIDS!  Turns out on this cruise, there are very few kids anyway.  All areas full.  Down to deck 2.

I find an ok chair or couch thing, and sit there a while.  I leave after I get tired of all the people being confused over the handicapped restroom.  "it says ladies and gentlemen!"  So just go down 3 more steps to the ladies room.  I went to the "enchanted forest", what a joke.

It's kinda dark, but it's supposed to be a cozy place for quiet conversation, etc so on.  It's got trees on the ceiling and walls, the chairs are made of sticks, etc.  not comfortable.  I wander around some more, I find the "secret deck" which is a crew area, this is where you could pretend that you're Leon DCappuchino on board the Titanic.  Not when he draws the naked girl, or even when he has rumpypumpy with her, it's the other place, the one on deck.

I go thru the "library" which is full of computers and fake books, and a few locked cabinets with real books in them.  Not sure how you get one out.  Break the case?  I imagine you'd wind up like Leon with handcuffs around the pipe then!

Nice use of space, huh?

Into the "sports bar" which is right next to the casino, which is smoky.  Looks like a lot of salt in this windowsill.

Cleanliness is next to godliness, or something like that, huh?  I suppose I should have tested one of those lumps, to see if it was indeed salt.  What else could it be?  meth?  The chairs suck, there is throwball on the tv, I get the hell out of there.

I finally settle on the area outside Billie's piano bar, pretty comfortable, decent light.  Plus there is a shapely girl in a bikini applying sunscreen.  This helps a lot.  I sit and read for a while and then move on.  I finally found the most comfortable place, outside the "legend cafe", they had 8 weird looking chairs, but they were comfortable. I sit there and read until I realize I better get some lunch or the boozeathon will be no fun at all.

I must have went to the lido for lunch buffet, but I really don't remember.  Seems like I had some fried chicken, some corn bread that wasn't....I just don't remember. None of it was great.

Cruise Critic meet and greet, scheduled for 2 @ Billies bar.  This was set up by a dude, I paid in advance...basically it's open bar for an hour, cost: about $11.50.  Best value on the ship, when a single drink is about $6.  A can of coke is over $2.  Cruise Critic is a forum for cruisers to bitch about the cruises they didn't like and blab about the good times they had.  People can post questions and answers to the questions.  Like I said, it's an internet forum.  It melted my crabbyness away.  It officially ended at 3, but I hung around until closer to 4, then went to the room.  Took a little nap, got dressed for dinner.  Formal night, so I'm going to wear a buttony shirt and a tie. 

Dinner was lobster and shrimp, which was good.  what do I have for pics?

I suppose that Carnival figgers that everyone has ADHD and needs constant entertainment, so every night at dinner, the waiters either sing a song or dance to a song.  Tonight, they are singing to us.  You KNOW we're trend setters, right?  Hey, I figger if I dance with her at dinner when no one else in the joint is dancing, it'll get me off the hook for the rest of the trip.  Besides, it makes all the other fellers look bad and get hit on the arm.  I could almost hear the "whispers"..."LOOK!  THE FAT GUY IS DANCING, WHY WON'T YOU DANCE WITH ME??? YOU BASTARD!!! STOP LOOKING AT HER BUTT!!" Lots of people complain about the dancing and the singing during dinner, but we kinda liked it.  They give you 2 hours for dinner, might as well enjoy it, make the most of it.

I don't remember what this was, but it was excellent.  The sauce was awesome.

We went to see a show, a comedian or 2, looked at our pics and back to the room.  I had sent the senior cruise director a note about dinner, wrote in a funny story, and he sent a bottle of bubbly wine, a ship trophy and a short letter.  Pretty nice.  So there you see Val and our decorated door.  We went to bed, tomorrow is a busy day!